How to Talk to Teens About Suicide
Talking with your child about suicide can be difficult but it is essential and may even be life-saving.
Suicide is a difficult and uncomfortable topic to talk about. But with suicide being the second leading cause of death among youth ages 15-24 and the third leading cause of death in 15-19 year olds, the need to be open and honest is even greater.
While the causes of suicide are varied and complex—substance use disorders, bullying, financial troubles, trauma, and mental illness have all been linked to suicide—it is an issue that can affect both children and adults. But many parents are wary about broaching such a serious and sensitive topic with their kids.
Studies have shown that asking your child about suicide will not “put the idea into their head.” In fact, it could open the door to an honest conversation about their mental health.
One common worry is that talking about suicide with kids will “put ideas in their head” or cause suicide. But many adolescent mental health experts believe the opposite is true.
Instead, these conversations can help teens dealing with thoughts of suicide understand that they can find support and they aren’t alone in their thinking. It also helps them see that they are loved and people want them to stay in their lives.
So, where can parents or guardians start? Here are some expert insights on how to talk to adolescents about suicide.
Start by asking your teen what they know or have heard about suicide. Gather information, present facts, and dispel any myths, including the idea that those who take their own life are selfish and weak. Answer questions they may have without shame, judgment or fear.
It’s also important to listen without judgment when you’re talking to your teenager about suicide. If your child opens up to you about their feelings, try not to judge them or tell them they’re wrong. Instead, listen without interruption, and let them know that their feelings are valid. This can help your teenager feel heard and understood and encourage them to keep talking to you about suicidal thoughts in the future.
Help your teen come up with a plan of what they’ll say or do if the topic of suicide comes up in their social circles. Teach your child the best way to support their friends who express suicidal thoughts is to ask a safe adult for help, even if it means going against their friend’s wishes.
Check in with your teen on other ways they need or want support from you – and you can bring some beginning suggestions, such as check ins during the morning, afternoon and/or evening; “themed” check in’s (e.g., emotion as weather, movie, character, etc.); help waking up in the morning; sending each other funny memes during the day; doing something together, etc.
Always remind them help is available if they ever find themselves in that position. Validate their feelings by saying things like “That must be hard” or “It sounds like you’re dealing with a lot.” Suggest people or places they can turn to if they are ever having suicidal thoughts.
If you believe your teen is in crisis, call 911 or take them to a hospital for evaluation. If your concerns are less urgent, seek help as soon as possible from a mental health professional. Your child’s school psychologist might be able to share resources in your community.
Suicide Prevention Resources for Parents
The National Suicide Prevention Hotline: 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
Crisis TextLine, Text “Home” to 741741
The Trevor Lifeline for LGBTQ+ Youth – 1-866-488-7386
About Camino a Casa
Casa Pacifica is the largest non-profit provider of children’s and adolescent mental health services in Ventura and Santa Barbara Counties. The agency’s Camino a Casa program, available to clients with private insurance, provides behavioral health care to youth ages 12-17 who struggle with emotional dysregulation and high-risk behaviors that jeopardize their safety at home, school and/or community.
Intensive short-term residential treatment, partial hospitalization, intensive outpatient and in-home behavioral health services comprise Camino a Casa’s full continuum of adolescent mental health care.
Camino a Casa specializes in mental health treatment for youth ages 12-18 including residential treatment, partial hospitalization, intensive outpatient and in-home behavioral services. Contact us today at 805-366-4000 to learn more about our therapeutic programs specifically for adolescents.
Learn more at www.caminoacasa.org
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